Brooks poses for the camera. I didn't want to have to post this, but I'll go ahead, at least for the blackmail value. This is what happens when you play strip poker at 3am. To his credit there were also girls involved. It is sad that today you can't do anything crazy anymore because there is always some idiot there with a camera to record it and post it to the internet. In this case that idiot is me! Hahahahahahaha! I really could start a small business either blackmailing people not to post the pics I have, or selling them online, or access to the url after I post it. That is the nature of entrepeneurialism in the internet age. Some of you may know what I mean. I'll give you my paypal account. Anonymous payments accepted, just write a cryptic note that lest me know who you are and what photos you do or don't want. Of course it's also reciprical, if you have incriminating evidence of me that may derail my political career later in life, let me know, and we'll work out a deal. Those of you out there know who I am talking to.

The Beach

A beautiful spot I found. Hgiher off the beach, I still had a bungalow right by the water. A lovely view from the patio where the restaurant was. Family owned, but this was not a good thing cause Mama was a raging bitch. She told me no rooms, then changed her mind, then doubled the price. When you go there she greets you with a scream "what you want?!" Using the tone that a woman would use when being attacked in a dark alley late at night. At first I thought it was just me but she treats all her guests this way. Sadly Thailand is beautiful but the people are fucked up (of course this is true of most places on this planet). They are so spoiled by western tourists that they just try to jack you for a nickel all the time. Really annoying.

This is the view from a resort where you can go learn Tai Chi for 5 days.







My buddies. I met these guys on the overnight train down from Bangkok. It takes 12 hrs. Then you take a 3hr boat ride. The guy on the left is a cool German guy who takes Americans on tours of Europe 6 months a year, and takes the rest of the year off to study Chi-Gong and Chinese medicine (with time for a beach party in Thailand obviously). Talk about beating the system. The guy on the right is Canandian. He wants to be in Doctors Without frontiers, and volunteer teaches English in Bangkok. All good goals, but we'll see if his raging alchoholism gets in the way.



This is where th rich people stayed. You can sit on a bean bag chair on a deck right next to the beach. They show movies at night. Also it is a semi-nude beach, which is illegal in Thailand, but then again so are a lot of things that go on. If the cops don't enforce the law, who cares, right?



I like coconuts, you can break them open and they smell liek ladies lying in the sun. -WSP

The beach bar





This is one place I stayed. I had a beach bungalow right here on the beach for $10US. Nice little porch with a hammock. There is a little restaurant there that playes reggae music at night. Also you can walk down the beach to the upscale resort where retards are paying up to $100 to stay in the same place because they want luxuries like indoor plumbing, AC, and TV.

This last photo is the Kings palace. Well, i only got shots from far away because you have to wear long pants to go inside, and since it was 93 out, I was wearing shorts. They do have a place where you can change into pants that they provide, but I refused. It's the principle of the thing. Who are you to tell me that I have to wear long pants? I'm the King of Siam! Well whoopteefreakingdooo your majesty but you can suck it. So I didn't go in. And it is sad really because who knows if I will ever go back there and get to see that beautiful place? I know I am being stupid, but you gotta have your principles right? Also I just have a deep seated hatred of monarchy and authority in my blood, so when it is 93 and some dingleberry says I gotta put pants on and I am on vacation, my natural reaction is "fuck you your highness". You're no better than me, why should I put pants on for you? Now to enter a Wat (temple) sometime this also applies but at least that's religious and I respect the Buddha. See the top pic. It is a 40 foot long, 20 foot high gold Buddha. This was essentially Buddha's message: "When I die, build huge gold monuments to me while the people live in poverty".

Bangkok

More temples and pics of bangkok

Ride the river boat ferry

So I found out the hard way that the only way to get around in Bangkok is to take public transport. There is a subway and a sky train, and they are connected, but they don't go everywhere, so sometimes you have to take the riverboat. Taxis and Tuk tuks are no good. First because traffic is terrible, so it is way slower. Second, they always try to rip you off. Taxis have to turn on the meter, and if they do it is cheap, $2 US across town, but a lot will try to take you with no meter and try to charge you $6-10. I had one guy tell me that it should cost $40 to go to the airport, when it actually costs $4. Tuk tuk (open air three wheeled motorcycles) suck because you get to smell the city, which is so foul, so foul. Also they will run you all over town. I was trying to go to the train station, but dude took me to a tailor shop, a jewelerry store and so before we got there, and then he wanted a tip! One taxi driver took me to meet his friend in a shady alley, and the guy got in chatted for a bit, then got something out of the trunk, before we were on our way. Shady? So take the the subway, sky train and river boat, you will have to take all 3 usually to get where you are going, and it may take an hour, but this is way better, cheaper, and safer. Plus the view is nice.

Bonzai

Roads

Did you know that you can already say the word for "road" in both Chinese and Thai?
It's easy. You know your good buddy Lou? Well his name also means road in Chinese!
And you know soy that you put in your Latte? Well thats road in Thai!
This language lesson has been sponsored by Gabe's English school, coming to a community
near you soon!

Patriotism

What country is the most patriotic? I bet it is the lowest shithole on the planet, somewhere in central Africa. It seems the goodness of a country is inversely related to how patriotic the people are there. I always thought America was way overboard with the patriotism, flag waving, national anthem and stuff. However much we love our country, we hate our politicians and leaders though, which gives me hope for our sanity. Well, living in Taiwan, nothing much is changed. People like Taiwan OK I guess, but are far less patriotic, and still hate the politicians. Actually their patriotism is very weak, they are not very sure what their country should be. Should they model after Japan, China, America, or just be themselves. Not sure. But most will agree the best way to succeed is to get out and go to Canada and America, even thought they have it pretty goof over here. Then I went to Thailand. They love their country, and they love their king. They have more flags up and pictures of the king everywhere then I have ever seen. They play the freakin national anthem before movies for God's sake! They love their stupid king. Now to be fair he is a pretty fair dude, and he seems to have been working to improve the lot of the poor people. But I ask you this: if the king is so smart, why do you drive on the wrong side of the road. It is completely archaic in the 21st century to be ruled by a king. Why is this so bad if he helps poor people? Because he has too much power behind the scenes and has built a cult of personality. Recently he decided that the newly re-elected Prime Minister was gaining too much popularity and was a threat so he authorized a military coup to take him out. Nothing much changed, but democracy is severly undermined by such things, and this is the problem with having a king and a democracy. And because of his cult of personality, the people love him, and since he said the coup was OK, everybody got on board and said that it was a good thing, even though they had just elected the other guy! Ugh. Stupid stupid stupid. I think the only countries that have been cured of patriotism is western europe because of the war they learned the hard way that it just don't pay. The King is dead, long live the King!

A note on Free Speech

We have freedom of speech here in Taiwan, sorta the same as the US but not exactly. Anyways I am more or less free to say whatever I want, and I do, and this is helped by the fact that 99% of the people here have no idea what I am saying anyways. I tend to speak my mind and just say whatever I think, which gets me in trouble and offends people, but also can be successful at times. This has actually helped me at work, despite my sometimes criticism of the place. However, instead of just criticising, I also include practical suggestions on how to fix or improve the said problem, and my boss likes this. Now my buddy was not so lucky, he was fired for the same thing. He saw a kid with a black eye, and asked what was wrong, and it turns out Daddy beats him if he gets less than 95% on his test. OK, so believe me when I say the Taiwanese education system is strict, and there is a lot of pressure on these kids. Anyways, so he posted this disturbing news on his blog, they found out, and they fired him over it, cause it looks bad for the school (loss of face). Now you say thats terrible, but couldn't this happen in the US too? If you put some sensitve info that your company doesn't want out there in the public domain, mightint they fire you too? Possibly. So anyways, I tend to edit myself a lot in this blog, well aware that it is in the public domain, even though probably only 3-4 people read it (you know who you are). I tend to keep it "G" rated and not covering any racy or sensitive material. Why?
It's not that I am afraid of losing my job. It's just to protect the guilty, and I include myself in their number. Rule #1: don't incriminate yourself. Now, dear reader, you say, "well then, what am I missing? All the good stuff? All the dirt? The answer is yes. So what to do? I have been seriously considering writing a book with all the good parts included, under a psuedonymn of course. Then I am safe, you can get all the good parts, and I can make a buck. Everybody wins!

Cool temples in Thailand